Astoreth does Ferelden Part 17: Howe's Estate
by Natmonkey
Summary: Follow Astoreth as she traipses through Ferelden and shares her thoughts and wonders. In this instalment: our heroine and three of her companions venture into the Howe Estate for a daring rescue. How are they going to pull this one off?
1. A Lesson

_Hello and welcome to part seventeen._

* * *

**A Lesson**

Rough night. Not a whole lot of sleep to be had. I keep thinking about Leliana and Isabela making sweet, sweet love to one another. That would be enough to keep drowsiness away from the coldest of people, I'm sure, let alone from me. Dear Maker, what a sight. And now I'm lying here with the beautiful Morrigan. She is also very attractive. Still, I guess sleeping with only women (even if they've showered me with attention and orgasms) will never give me that delightful sleepy feeling after sex with a man. Wish I'd had the foresight of bringing my toy with me. I bet that would have been a great hit with the ladies. If only I could use it now. Softly I stroke the witch's bare arm. She smiles in her sleep. A lovely thing to see. More of a smile on those voluptuous crimson lips would no doubt make her more popular. She knows this too, surely; I'm also sure she will use this little fact to her advantage whenever needed.

Let's see if I can get away from here. Morrigan allows me to gently lay her down, upon which she promptly tangles herself into the blankets. Guess she's all set then. Now for myself. Shale has been kind enough to dump my share of the bags in a corner, I've only just noticed; I quickly find the one containing my new nighties. Which one shall I wear? The sexy little red number? The blue one? The slinky green dress with the big black bow? The black one Leliana found too sombre, but that I had to have anyway? Zev probably doesn't care what I have on. You know, it just occurred to me that even after all this shopping, I still managed to forget to pick up a cloak. Well, shit.

I'll go for the green one then. It's very flattering and not all too slutty. The arlessa would probably still throw a fit if she saw me walking the halls like this, but the arl decided to leave her in Redcliffe. Thank goodness for that. I need more whining like I need a broken control rod up the arse. I quietly close the door behind me, off to sneak to my sweet elf's room. Brr, do the stones ever feel cold against my feet. Just awful. Well, would you look at that? Guess I'm not the only one having trouble sleeping. "Morning, Sten."

"_Kadan_." His piercing violet eyes look me up and down. "What did I tell you about watching the way you carry yourself?" He takes a step closer to me, a certain menacing quality to his posture. "Will you never learn?"

"Uhm, I suppose not?" I don't see what the problem is. If I want to walk around like this, it is my own damn business. "Look, it's really none of-..."

The man backs me up against the wall; he is awfully close now. "Then I suppose I will have to teach you myself." Suddenly I feel very cold, because my lovely new nightgown has been torn to tatters.

"What the _fuck_! I just bought that thing!" Irrational much?

"Quiet," the Qunari growls, clapping his hand over my mouth. Without ceremony of any kind, he picks me up and hoists me over his shoulder; I'm too damn stunned to do anything. Before long, I find myself being dumped onto a bed. "This is for your own good, _kadan_." The giant looms over me as he pries my legs apart with his knee. I'm just about to protest, but then his hand is back over my mouth. A whimper exits my throat as his free hand find its way to my wetness, coating his fingers in it. "Don't you see that this is what will happen if you continue dressing the way you do?" A thick finger takes possession of me. Mmm... I fail to see the issue here, personally. Who scratches my itch matters very little to me. His lips move closer to my ear, while he begins fucking me with his finger. Well, too. "Are you going to scream, _kadan_?" I shake my head and my mouth is free again.

Perhaps I should say something, but I want to do nothing but moan and enjoy myself. "So," I finally manage to pant. "What if this is exactly what I want to happen?" I just want a nice, stiff cock in me, is all. Nothing wrong with that, is there? Even better if it's attached to an exotic creature like our stalwart warrior. Strange, but not entirely unexpected. He did show me his tender side of his very own accord, after all. Seems he likes more than only kittens and flowers. I'm going to thoroughly enjoy him. And then brag to Morrigan about it.

Sten pulls me up, hands under my shoulders. "Then I will have to change tactics." Those strong hands coax me onto my knees. Oh, my... Looks like he's already taken the trouble of whipping out his tool for me. And such a big one it is; goes so well with the rest of him. I lay my hand on him, feeling the hulking beast of a thing quiver. "Open wide," the giant demands. His voice betrays nothing, but the slight hoarseness that has crept in, oh, that certainly does.

"As if I could ever fit you in my mouth." Slowly I run my hand up his length; I can't even encircle it and there seems to be no end to him. Hmm... This reminds me of that dream I once had. I was afraid of his size then, but really, if I can survive childbirth, I can certainly survive being skewered to his cock. I rather enjoy a challenge.

"You have two hands and a tongue, _kadan_." The Qunari utters a slight groan. "Use them."

Slowly I swirl my tongue around the very tip, bringing forth another groan. "I can be very creative, I will have you know." I look up to see a flushed face, which is very promising. Seeing how stoic he always is, this is really the most a girl can hope for. How much would I be able to fit in my mouth? Hardly anything, but he seems to enjoy it anyway. Sucking, licking and nibbling whatever bits I can reach, my hands – this really is a two-hand job – firmly massage his thick shaft. Ah, this is what I've been lacking all night. I am almost purring with delight as I run my tongue along his rigid flesh.

"Enough of this." He lays me down again, placing himself between my legs. Well, well... I wonder where this will lead. Yeah, as if I don't know. Rubbing the head of his cock between my slick lips, the man asks: "Is this truly what you want, _kadan_?"

I wrap my arms around his powerful neck and rest my head in the slope of his shoulder. "Yes, take me," I whisper against his heated skin. "Please."

"If that is your wish." Slowly but surely he stretches me, fills me. Sweet Maker, this is good. There is some pain, which is to be expected, but nothing I can't handle. "I get the distinct feeling, _kadan_, that you are not learning anything from this." His voice is breathless. Other than that, nothing.

"If anything, you've just taught me I need an ample supply of seductive nightgowns." Then suddenly he pulls out of me, pushes back in again and I couldn't speak if my life depended on it. The friction is insane! So deep... I mewl delightedly as Sten continues his lesson. Oh yes, this'll teach me... This will teach me very well. My nails rake down his shoulder blades as he pumps into me with mercilessly hard strokes. Mmm, I do love a good hard pounding.

Suddenly I hear an impatient tongue clicking beside me. I open my eyes and lo! There is Morrigan sitting beside me on the bed, with an agitated look on her beautiful face. "Do hurry it up, Astoreth." She sighs in exasperation. "'Tis my turn next..."

"Do not mind me." Leliana has appeared too, quill and parchment in hand. "I am merely here to observe." The redhead turns to Morrigan. "How would you describe his size then?"

The witch nods confidently. "Hung like a bronto!"

Wynne pops up as well – why not – conspicuously holding up needle and thread. "I am ready to stitch up whoever needs it!" She shoots me a disparaging look. "Not you, Astoreth, you must be like a cavern down there."

"Why, thank you, old cat." Morrigan smiles sweetly at the old lady. "You are so considerate." Her lean arms reach out to Wynne, pull her into an embrace. Before long, the women are kissing each other with intense passion.

Leliana furiously scribbles on her parchment, eyebrows knitted together. "Fascinating…"

Sten, meanwhile, lets out an appreciative whistle. "Nice!"


	2. Wake-Up Call

**Wake-Up Call**

Another one of those batty dreams. Ugh. The second one revolving around good old Sten. I must be fucking crazy to want him so badly. Also, why must they always end so bizarrely? A slight chuckle in my ear tells me that Morrigan knows exactly what ails me. "You must have been having a wonderful dream, my friend."

"Yes and no." I rub my eyes and yawn. "This is the second sex dream I've had about Sten." I think I'll just leave out the part where she starts making out with Wynne. Maker's mercy, what is wrong with me? Maybe I should be carted off to some institution for the magically insane.

"Why is this the first time I have heard of this?" She lightly slaps my arm. "Do tell." Despite the previous night's drunkenness, she looks fresh as a daisy and wide awake. Maybe she wasn't as drunk as I thought, just really in need of a cuddle.

I groan. This is ridiculous; I should do something about this aching feeling. "Why? They're only dreams…" Meaningless. Not entirely so, of course. "And besides, I need to get laid."

"Because I am curious." Morrigan sighs, watching me jump out of bed. "I realize 'tis none of my concern, but is this truly wise?"

"Huh? What do you mean?" Ha, imagine me walking into Sten on the way to Zevran and my dreams coming true… Impossible. If he isn't interested in a lovely woman like Morrigan, he certainly won't be interested in me. Perhaps I remind him of someone. A child? Might be. He could have a dozen little tykes running around in his homeland, for all I know. Would a Qunari toddler be as tall as I am?

"I know you favour both Alistair and Zevran with your attentions."

I look back at the lady who has just uttered that statement in the blankest tone of voice. It's no use denying, obviously. "How'd you find out?"

"Oh, 'tis quite amazing how many things one hears and sees, disguised as a cat." She chuckles and flops onto her back, looking at me upside-down. "I mean to say that they might not be willing to share you for much longer." Her golden eyes regard with me with genuine concern. It doesn't even let up when I hold up my two favourite new nightgowns and she gets to pick one out for me. Red it is, then.

"I appreciate your concern, Morrigan, but I can't choose between those two." I'd been thinking about it, but I just can't seem to reach a conclusion. Both are amazing. I want my cake and eat it too. Preferably off one or both of them. Mmm. Now there's a thought. "I simply can't."

She grins bare those pearly white teeth. "That I can fully understand. Hopefully, they will too." With a cat-like expression on her face, the girl stretches her body luxuriously. Upon which her breasts fall from her top; that was bound to happen at some point. Mrrrrow, nice. Very nice. She readjusts the crimson fabric, wholly unconcerned. "Alistair is most likely to be unforgiving."

"That'll be the Chantry boy in him." Man, are those lovely. I'd like to cover them with little kisses, which she would probably not welcome. Never mind then. "You could stick around for a while and then I'll tell you all about my dreams when I return." Dreamy sigh… "Maybe I'll even tell you about how I slept with Leliana last night." Astoreth, you ninny! I was not supposed to say that at all. What must she think of me? Leliana, I mean. This is awfully rude of me. You'd think that after years of being teased by Daniela not wanting to kiss and tell, I might follow that example. Nope.

Morrigan gasps. "You did not!" Far from disgusted, as I had half expected her to be, she only seems surprised and curious. That is something, at least.

"I most certainly did." Ah, another memory to cherish forever. It might even happen again. I enjoyed the threesome, but somehow, it didn't feel quite as intimate as it should have. Hot, yes. Insanely so. Not very romantic at all. When did I become such a starry-eyed maiden? Guess I just enjoy romance and tenderness. And cocks. Let's not forget those. "With her and this woman we picked up near a brothel." Extremely unromantic and not a cock in sight.

The witch's nose wrinkles in disdain. "Do make sure you have not caught any diseases." Then curiosity seems to get the better of her anyway. Her eyes sparkle. "Tell me of your adventures, if you would."

"Stick around…" With a teasing wave, I walk out of the room. My, if looks could kill. Good for her they don't, because then she would never hear my stories. Now, which one is my enticing Antivan's room again? Here we are. The door opens very silently; they must keep the hinges well-oiled. The elf is all by himself. Quite surprising, but you won't hear me complain. This is going to be a wake-up call he will enjoy.

Somehow I manage to crawl under his covers without waking him. His delicious scent is overwhelming here. Let's kick things off by covering his gorgeous stomach with kisses. Firm, but his skin feels so soft and smooth. Warm. Zevran, meanwhile, snorts in his sleep and still does not awaken. Some Crow he is… I pull down his silky smalls until they are bunched around his knees. Aww, how cute! He's still small; never seen him like that before. One row of soft kisses down the length of him and his shaft lazily thickens under my lips. The confused noises he is making tell me that Zev is about to wake up. "Good morning, crumpet." A full-blown moan sounds as I run my tongue up his now very hard cock.

"Oh, good morning," the elf purrs in a drowsy voice. "What a wonderful surprise, _fiammina_." His elegant fingers tangle into my hair, his hands insistently urging me to take him deeper into my mouth. Happily. Twisting and twining my tongue around his shaft, I glide up and down. This has to be my favourite hobby. Such wonderful sounds one gets to hear. Praise too. I'm still a sucker for praise as ever. Maybe it's time for me to update my repertoire and garner even more. Massaging his rod with my left hand, I thoroughly moisten the index finger of my right. Zevran utters a little squeal at the intrusion. That went very smoothly. "You truly aim to please, no?" He chuckles in amusement.

"Always!" I confidently tell him before attacking his cock with my mouth once more. His muscles rhythmically contract around my finger while I move it back and forth. How pleasant it feels in here… Velvety and snug. No wonder Virgil is so fond of this. If I had a cock, I would undoubtedly be too. I look up to see the lovely elf propped up on his elbows and watching me intently. Between the moaning and the panting, he is grinning from ear to ear. Now that is something I like to see. We continue looking at one another; when the tell-tale throbbing begins and Zev squeezes his eyes shut, I am still staring at him. Maker's breath, how beautiful. Not even a generous helping of cum down my throat beats the sight of a gorgeous man enjoying his climax. His body relaxes and he falls into his pillows with a long, content sigh. "So, how was that?" I climb up to wrap the elf in my arms.

Naturally, he lays his head in my bosom right away. Hurt because Wynne would not allow it, of course. I understand. "You have a gift, _fiammina_." Zevran snuggles up to me. "I think you deserve a reward for this."

"Oh?" I wiggle my eyebrows. "What did you have in mind?" There are a few things that I can think of.


	3. Sweet Crumpet

**Sweet Crumpet**

"Allow me some time to recover my basic functions," my handsome companion laughs. "I have not been pleasured in such a mind-meltingly amazing way in a long time." Suddenly he perks up. "Why, my lovely, lovely Warden…" His hands glide down my satin-covered sides. "I do so adore what you are wearing." Aaaaand we're back. Softly those voluptuous lips press urgent kisses down the side of my neck, his hands slipping into my dress. My nipples harden under his skilled touch and a low moan escapes me. This reminds me of my wonderful time last night; I will never forget it, no matter how frustrated a state it left me in. Another one for the old memoires. Zev's lips quickly follow his hands, covering my breasts with licks and kisses. Lovely, but not what I was waiting for. I push him lower; laughingly he obeys my unspoken command. Not without teasing, I might add. He can be so very mean sometimes. His fingers lightly caress the insides of my thighs, his lips lingering on my belly.

"Zev…" No response at all he makes, save a wicked little laugh. "Don't be so cruel."

His liquid honey eyes glow up at me from under the covers. "Cruel, me? Tell me what you would like me to do, then, my sweet Warden." The naughtiness is practically dripping from his every word.

"Blow my mind with your tongue again."

He sits up and clears his throat. "The symphony I see in thee, it whispers songs to me." What in Thedas is _this_? "Songs of hot breath upon my neck." The man recites this crap with an air of supreme seriousness. "Songs of soft sighs by my head, songs of nails upon my back." Oh, man. "Songs of thee come to my bed." He looks at me as if he expects an applause. "Well, has your mind been blown?"

"That was fucking awful!" I burst out laughing. "Did you compose that yourself?" Though I'm not sure if composing is the right word for it.

"Oh, no, this was recited to me by a rather wealthy target of mine." Zevran joins in the laughter. "I cannot believe she thought this garbage would convince me to spare her." The hilarity soon dies down, the smouldering back in his pretty eyes. He covers my body with his and makes me swallow my chuckles. One hand slips into my knickers; his teeth close around my earlobe. "Tell me what you would like me to do, _fiammina_," he whispers heatedly into my ear. Two fingers buried deep inside of me, his thumb teases my clit. No wonder I can't speak. "What is the matter?" His voice is full of mischief. "Cat got your tongue?" All I can do is moan helplessly under his mind-blowing ministrations. It's not a cat that has got my tongue, no… Either I am extremely sensitive or he is very good, because it takes very little time to begin writhing and wriggling in ecstasy. Sweet Andraste… My mind goes fuzzy – I am all goose flesh and sensitive nerves.

While the climactic waves are still ebbing away, the lovely elf positions himself between my thighs and smoothly enters. His rapid, powerful thrusts make me feel as if my orgasm is being prolonged and dragged out. Deliciously so. I wrap my legs around his waist, screaming his name. This place has thick walls, thankfully. I can be as loud as I bloody well want to, so I tell him to go harder and faster. To be rough with me. How spectacularly he complies… Somehow I find myself on my stomach with that gorgeous cock in me, his hand roughly pulling my hair as he fucks me mercilessly. The growled Antivan phrases in my ear only make me wetter, make the muscles of my cunt twitch like crazy. And then, something entirely new to me: Zev's fingers snake around my throat, softly squeezing. Is it normal for me to find this so hot? The slight difficulty in breathing doesn't bother me at all. My moans become choked as his grip tightens.

That familiar twitch sets in, accompanied by a breathless announcement of his impending finish. I help that wonderful, wonderful creature along by milking him for all he's got. "Mmm, Zev…" I roll onto my back with a happy sigh. "Have I told you that you are a god in the bedroom?"

"Do go on," the elf laughs happily. "Tell me more about how good I am." He eyes me with slight concern. "Was I too rough?"

"You were just rough enough," I reply, smoothing my tousled hair. Ah... I feel fantastic. "Thank you very much."

Zevran treats me to another one of those deep, sensual kisses of his. "Thank _you_."

"My pleasure." My pleasure indeed. Good grief. The man is a veritable repository of delicious sexual techniques. I nestle into his arms, feeling delightfully sluggish and heavy with contentment. This is exactly what I needed.

"I was unaware such lovely garments were made by your people," he chuckles lazily, running his fingertips over my side. "You look ravishing."

I blush, even though it's not the first time he has paid me such compliments. "Thank you... You're right though, these weren't exactly selling like hotcakes."

"Fereldan ladies are too practical to enjoy such things, I think." Softly he presses an affectionate kiss to my cheek. "I am pleased that you are not, however."

"I'm a mage, Zev, we don't do practical." Going into battle covered in only cloth is not a brilliant idea, after all. Enchantments can only do so much. "Short skirts, tight robes, living in towers, messing with the elements..." The list goes on and on.

His hand glides down the side of my thigh. "But no high heels."

"Never! Leliana had me try on a pair yesterday and I fell flat on my face."

I can see that my sweet companion is trying not to burst out laughing, but he fails despite his best efforts. That's all right. It was pretty funny. "I realize it is rude of me to laugh at your expense, _fiammina_," he hiccups. "But the image..." Tears stream from his eyes as he snorts loudly.

"Shale was amused too." I chuckle mildly. It's not _that_ funny. "Imagine, we are having a pair of shoes custom made for her."

"A golem!" Zevran roars with laughter. "Wearing shoes!" He is shaking so violently, the poor slob falls out of bed. From the floor, the merriment continues. "Oh, I am going to _die_..."

I peek over the side of the bed. "Please don't." No danger there, I think. He is just lying there butt-ass-naked and giggling like a loon. "Get back up here, you. I don't want you to catch a cold."

"I can't!" The elf flops about like a fish out of water. Guess there is nothing else for it. With pillows and blankets, I simply join him on the floor. The stones are rather chilly, courtesy of the lack of fire in the hearth. No matter. We are good at warming each other up. Still giggling, my friend allows me to lay a pillow under his head and a blanket half under, half over his body. His glee does not last much longer as I press my lips to his and straddle his loins. Easily and quickly I rub him back to full hardness. That sublime cock finds a warm, wet home in my eager sheath. I begin riding him – gently at first – coaxing forth the most beautiful moans. And here I thought I was satisfied.

My pace and force pick up; a filthy squelch sound every time he is fully buried inside. His rod hits me deliciously deeply. In fact, his shape and size are perfect for reaching that certain spot. I'm still not quite sure what it is, but I fucking love it. The pressure in my gut is so intense, it hurts. One final push and I'm there. Ripples of a kind of insane euphoria race through my body as I once again scream his name, hot liquid erupting all over his stomach. My partner joins me in climax; he whimpers rather adorably. _Now_ I'm satisfied. I collapse on his panting frame, covering his face with little kisses. "Now this is a good morning."

"Mmm, I'll say." Zevran curls up to me, his eyes half closed in that typical way of his. "You know, the ladies in the whorehouse who could climax as spectacularly as you do, raked in great amounts of money with their shows." He laughs. "Sometimes even enough to retire from the trade altogether."

"Oh, I see…" I yawn. "I'll remember that for when I'm ready for a career change." And to think that I have him to thank for my new experiences. Before returning to Ostagar, I'd never even heard of it. I was so determined not to sleep with him too. Goes to show how much willpower I have. Still, I am enjoying myself and life is short enough as it is. More than a year since my Joining. Less than twenty-nine more to go. How time flies.

I find my companion looking at me intently. "Tell me something, Warden."

"What?" It feels weird when he calls me that. I've become so used to all the pet names.

A saucy grin appears on his face. "How does Alistair compare to me?"

Well, fuck. Of course he knew – I mean, who _else_ would I be sleeping with? – but I never thought he would just come out and ask such a question. How could I possibly deny my escapades with Al? "I'm not sure..." I show him my sweetest smile. "You both have your charms."

"You would make a good politician." Zev shrugs. "Very well, I understand. I am in no position to claim your attentions." He drapes an arm around my shoulders. "I have not been exclusively with you, after all." His beautiful amber eyes are heavy-lidded.

"I don't expect you to be." I stretch, a wonderful feeling of fatigue in my limbs. "That would mean I couldn't be with Al." That would be such a shame. He's a wonderful person.

My lovely partner chuckles. "I was wondering why he was so cheerful all of a sudden. Rather a gloomy personage that one, no?"

"He has a lot of stuff going on." I shake my head. Snap out of it! This is not the time to go back to sleep. "I think I'll go take a bath. Care to join me?"

"I think I need a lie down after all that." Zevran folds his hands under his head, eyes closed. "I will see you at breakfast." He smiles when I kiss his cheek, frowns when I call him my sweet little crumpet. "I am not a pocked pastry," he huffs.

"Nope, but you are delicious." Another kiss. "See you later, crumpet."


	4. A Bath Time Miracle

**A Bath Time Miracle**

Morrigan isn't in my room anymore. I guess she got sick of waiting. How long have I been away, anyway? Never mind that. At least I am fully satisfied. I think. It's like with food: I don't have to be very hungry to eat. Now then… Shall I roam the halls dressed in nothing but this tiny little towel? I better not. What would I do without Cullen's old shirt? A bigger towel might be a good idea. And a cloak. Perhaps after the Landsmeet; I doubt we'll have many opportunities for mindless shopping in the time to come. I still haven't the foggiest what is going to happen there, though I suppose if Alistair wants Queen Anora to stay on the throne, we could help her. It's his party.

It's still really fucking cold around here. Let's add a pair of warm, fuzzy slippers to that list of necessities. Maybe a decent nightgown without any repairs that hides the fact that I'm a wanton strumpet as well. Heh, strumpet. I love that word.

Nobody in the bathroom. I had actually expected to find other people here, but it looks like I'm lucky. Privacy for a change! My goodness, will these miracles never cease? It seems a bit much, drawing such an enormous bath for only one person, but hey... There isn't any other option, actually. It's the big bath or no bath at all. And I like big baths; I cannot lie. Such decadence. A few bubbles and a drop or two of my new, deliciously fragrant strawberry oil and we are good to go. The water is almost too hot to bear. My skin turns pink from the heat, but I get used to it quickly. What a delight this is. I must benefit from these luxuries while I can. On the road we don't get many hot baths to look forward to; a rubdown of some crucial areas with cold water is usually it. Mmm... I lie back and close my eyes.

Oh, Maker's breath, I must have fallen asleep. The water is bloody cold now, the bubbles all gone. I look like an old prune too. Marvellous. Let's hope I don't catch a cold. I'd rather expected Alistair to find me in here and sexy times to ensue. Or Morrigan and a chat about my dreams and adventures. How disappointing. How boring! My life isn't always like a dirty novel. I drain the bath and jump out. Bah, humbug. Never again. I'm in the act of towelling myself off as Sten walks in. Just in time to not see me naked. Whew. "Hello." Heh, I like what he's wearing. Which isn't very much. No wonder I would like to try him out. It's his own damned fault, is what it is.

"Good morning, _kadan_." He peeks into the bath. "It would seem that I have bad timing."

"Not at all." I slip my nightie over my head for good measure. "The water had become cold anyway. I'll run you a fresh one, if you like."

Sten shakes his head. "Do not bother yourself on my account."

"It's no trouble at all." He doesn't protest any further, so I help him out. "Would you like bubbles with that?" I ask the man, holding up the vial that contains the magic liquid. He abruptly looks away when my gaze falls on him and nods. What is this? "Are you quite all right?" His face looks flushed, a slight pink shining through the dark tinge of his skin. "You're not becoming ill, are you?"

The Qunari sighs. "No, _kadan_, I don't think so." His eyes fix on mine, but there is a strange look in them. The fact that there is somewhat of a look in them is already strange to begin with. Sten takes a step back when I approach, determined to examine him. "There is really no need."

"Of course there is." I stare him down, or up in this case. "I need you to be ready for anything at all times. Now come." I crook my finger at the obstinate creature. "Stoop down to my level." It only takes the slightest of touches to know that something must be wrong with him. His forehead is burning and his heart is racing in his chest. Also, his muscles feel decidedly rigid. "Have you done anything to catch a cold?"

"No..." He shrugs, his cheeks taking on a deeper hue of pink. Curiouser and curiouser. "I did play fetch with Stubbs during your absence."

That shouldn't be enough to make him ill. Hmmm. "I see. Well, just get in the bath and soak for a little while." This is nothing serious, I'm sure. Qunari are so much hardier than humans. "You'll sweat out the sickness, then you'll be good as new." He nods in response, so I walk out. Aw, you know, I should really look after him better. He has saved my sorry hide quite a few times, after all. Just a little tender loving, or maybe just friendly care shouldn't be too much to ask. I'm still grateful for his comfort that time. And with his size, he's just perfect for cuddling. Sten is already sitting in the bath, back turned to me. His frame freezes up at my touch on his shoulder. "Just thought of something."

"What is it, _kadan_?" That's more like it. The typical Sten-brand weariness in his voice whenever he addresses me is back.

I sit myself on the edge beside him, placing my hands on his broad shoulders. His skin still feels like a fire is burning underneath it, muscles tense as can be. "You should relax." I start the kneading and the tension gets even worse. "I could help you, you know." For a brief moment I take my hands off him, to tip some fragrant oil into my palm and make it more enjoyable. For me, because it smells nice and for him, because it feels better than just my dry hands.

"I have no need of your help," he replies curtly. I can hear him sniffing; it really is a delightful smell and I'm sure he thinks so too.

"Yes, yes, I know; you're Sten of the Beresaad, Qunari warrior extraordinaire! Of course you have no need of my insignificant help." Deeply digging my fingers into the impressive cords of his muscles, I think of last night's dream and laugh. It seems so ridiculous now. "But it can't hurt, can it?" The Qunari makes no reply, but I can feel my treatment is beginning to work. I'm just that good. My fingers continue their work on their own, moving lower down his shoulder blades and spine. This is a wonderful thing to do. Maybe it could be a hobby. You know, for when I'm not busy fucking. "Now isn't this pleasant?"

Sten nods quietly. "You do not take no for an answer, do you?"

"Only if it's the answer I'm looking for." Now the arms. Maker's breath, they are massive. No wonder he handles Asala with such ease. I can barely even lift her. His fingers, though proportionately large, are surprisingly long and slender. One would expect coarser digits on such a powerful creature, but they are not like that at all. These look like the delicate hands of an artist. I suppose you might consider him one with his beloved blade. "There. How are you feeling?"

"There is nothing wrong with me," the man growls. Is this one of those male things? Where something is definitely wrong, but they would rather die than admit it? Pride is one thing, but sometimes they're ridiculous. Like that time Alistair nearly had his arm sliced off and claimed it was just a small nick. Men. I mentally roll my eyes. Hm, Sten still looks a bit pinkish; don't think I should bother him any longer though. No matter how much I would want to. What if he kills me out of sheer annoyance? I have stuff to do.

I get up. "Come by my room later, would you? I bought you a new set of armour and some cookies."

"Cookies?" If he wasn't so damn stoic, his face would've probably lit up like a candle. "Thank you, _kadan_. My armour is ready to fall apart at the seams."

"I know! And this one is even a proper set." I'll just leave him to it, then. His behaviour is so bizarre and since having a proper conversation with him is nigh impossible, I will probably never find out what might be wrong with him. That guy is so weird sometimes. Well, whatever. If he wants me to butt out, I'll butt out. Time for clothes and breakfast.

* * *

_Care for an explanation as to Sten's weird behaviour? Read _The Dog's Diary - Sticks and Swords_. It will all make sense._


End file.
